I was raised in an unstable home and constantly in and out of church. I loved the Lord from a very young age, but I was deeply emotionally broken and didn't know how to escape the prison in my own head and heart. As a teenager, I was baptized with the Holy Spirit and a year later called to preach the Gospel. That terrified me, but not because I was scared of the calling. I was scared to go all in and surrender everything to Jesus, because I was afraid to fully surrender only to find out that I didn't have what it takes and ultimately experiencing rejection from the Lord. All I'd ever known my whole life was rejection, abuse, and abandonment and I'd come to expect the same from the Lord, so I ran as hard as I could. I dropped out of high school, left home, and pursued anything that would help me forget my pain and failures. I whole heartedly believed that Jesus saves, heals and delivers and that He could and would indeed, do anything for anyone who asked...except for me. I never thought it possible for me to be free, healed, delivered, and made whole.
In my 20's I tried to come back to Him several times, but it would only last for 8-10 months and I couldn't figure out why. I tried my best to go all in, but couldn't get there.
Finally, He let me run hard and get my fill of this world, all the while, beckoning me to come back and repent. He never gave up on me as everyone else in my life had done. He never abandoned me, He never quit inviting me to His table. He never quit offering me an opportunity to repent and restore my relationship with Him. However; it wasn't until I was 43 years old that I finally answered that call to come home in Him.
When I came back on May 21, 2017, I had no idea how radically my life was about to change. About 7 months after committing my heart and life to Christ, He spoke to me after a season of prayer and fasting. He revealed to me that I had unforgiveness in my heart, which shocked me, because I had a reputation of forgiving easily. He spoke to me that night and said, "You have known about Me your whole life, but you have never known Me. It's time". In that moment He showed me that I was like a trapped wild animal with excruciating pain and longing for help, but terrified to allow anyone to get near the wound so I'd attack anyone that got too close. But He showed me that if I'd just stand still and FULLY trust Him, He would free me and He would heal those wounds and that is exactly what He's done. He walked me out of that prison by hand, one step at a time and I owe Him my everything.
Psychiatrists couldn't help me, meds didn't help me, drugs and alcohol didn't help me, relationships didn't help me, but just ONE night with Jesus, and He delivered me and started me on a journey to healing that has been both mind blowing and life changing. The really cool thing about Jesus, is that He's no respecter of persons, so what He's done for me, He'll do for you too and I'd love to share how you can have this freedom.
When we tell the story of our own conversion, I would have it done with great sorrow, remembering what we used to be, and with great joy and gratitude, remembering how little we deserve these things.
Friends describe me
Fun loving, an encourager, funny, dedicated to Jesus.
Reading, writing, painting, decorating, cell phone games
Fantasy dinner guests
Jesus, Noah, Moses, Jeremiah, George Washington, Thomas Jefferson, King David, and the Samaritan woman at the well.
Best advice I ever received
Trust Jesus with everything.
My worst subject in school
If I weren't a professor, I would
Be in full-time ministry to the hurting and bound.
The Bible, Hind's Feet on High Places, The Machiah Company
Jurassic Park (all of them except the 3rd one), Jumanji, The Passion of the Christ, The Ten Commandments, Overcomer, Courageous, I Can Only Imagine.
Nobody knows I
am pretty terrified of heights.
My latest accomplishment
Graduated from the first school of ministry to become an ordained minister. My son and I went through the program together.
The Bible. I'm taking a deeper dive into the historical and cultural context of the Bible. It is the most fascinating book I've ever read and the only one with the power to change hearts and lives.
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